Entertainment
The official Metro.co.uk Eurovision 2021 drinking game
It’s taken two years and a whole lot of Covid tests, but the Eurovision Song Contest is back, and it feels so good.
Tonight, 26 countries will compete to be crowned the 2021 champion, after the two semi-finals saw us lose another 13 acts. There’ll be drama, there’ll be tears, there’ll be a giant dancing finger on stage with Germany, and let’s face it, you’re probably going to need a drink to get through the four hours (yes, four) of utter lunacy, because lord knows as much as we love it, it can test your patience.
Don’t worry – we’re here to help.
Every Eurovision fan worth their salt will be settling down in front of their telly with a bottle of plonk, and we have updated Metro.co.uk’s official Eurovision drinking game to help you add a sense of activity to proceedings.
Whether bubbles, beer, non-alcoholic fizz or soft drinks tickle your fancy, get ready to down them as Rotterdam welcomes Europe this Saturday night.
N.B. Nobody wants to miss out on Amanda Holden shouting ‘good evening Europe’, so remember to pace yourself and keep some water to hand to have in between songs. Also, some snacks – may we suggest some Stroopwaffel or Hollandse nieuwe haring? (Actually, maybe the herring isn’t a good idea.) You don’t want to get sick and miss out on who the winner is. We take no responsibility for any hangovers that may result from the game.
During the performances
Bad joke: one finger
The most inevitable of all the rules. This can be a bad joke from the presenters (most likely, there are four of them), any act in the green room, or any joke from a skit. We don’t discriminate against failed comedy here.
‘It was better in rehearsals’: one finger
Graham Norton will have seen all of the performance in the jury rehearsals, so will inevitably remark that a country was a bit crapper than they were before.
We get to song nine: two fingers
Sir Terry Wogan always waited until song nine to have a drink, so it’s time to raise your glass. Fittingly, the UK performs in slot nine tonight.
(Picture: Rolf Klatt/Shutterstock)
Innuendos: one finger
The songs are disappointingly lacking in innuendos this year – not a single horny butter churner in sight – but that doesn’t mean Graham or the presenters won’t whip out a few double entendres (yes, ‘I’ll double your entendre’ counts).
Pyrotechnics: one finger
Eurovision loves a pyro. Sorry ‘bout it.
A song switches language: one finger
There’s quite a few examples of this in 2021, namely the titles of Cyprus and Malta’s song (El Diablo and Je Me Casse) and a section of The Netherlands’ song Birth of a New Age, which is in Sranan Tongo, a language spoken in Suriname.
A non-English song is sung: two fingers
Shout-out to France, Italy, Switzerland, Spain, Russia and Ukraine.
A former winner appears or is mentioned: one finger
Mans Zelmerlow is of course going to attend, because what would Eurovision be without an appearance from Mans? Teach-In, Lenny Kuhr, Sandra Kim, Helena Paparizou and Lordi are also scheduled to perform, and Duncan Laurence will be featured in some way despite having Covid-19 – so essentially, get ready to drink.
Graham insults someone: one finger
This will basically be every song, so steady yourselves.
Costume changes for the presenters: one finger
We’re looking at style icon Nikkie de Jager for this one.
Someone screams out thank you to the audience the second their final lyric ends: one finger
They’re just SO GRATEFUL, you guys.
A middle finger appears on stage: one finger
You’ll be surprised to learn that middle fingers play a part in two songs this year, courtesy of Finland and Germany.
A wild Flo Rida appears: two fingers
Song 26 people. It’s a weird year.
During the voting
Technical difficulties: one finger
We’ve put a man on the moon, yet we can’t connect Latvia to Rotterdam without a hitch.
Amanda Holden appears: Two fingers
Mandy is the UK’s spokesperson this year, so expect campness.
Graham Norton correctly predicts neighbours swapping douze points: two fingers
Ah, the voting bloc, you never fail to add fuel to the ‘it’s all about politics!’ fire.
A spokesperson decides to sing or play an instrument: one finger
Yes, you may be a minor popstar, but we haven’t got all night.
The UK gets 12 points: down your drink
It could happen!
Somebody’s gracious face slips: one finger
This, in tribute to 2019 Swedish entry John Lundvik, is bound to happen as the televote points are totted up. Somebody who excels in the jury vote can absolutely tank with the public and immediately rocket down the leaderboard. Cruel? Yes. Funny? Also yes.
Somebody gets nul point (either in the jury or televote): two fingers
It’s a lot harder to get nul point nowadays, but it can still happen.
The United Kingdom comes last: down your drink
We love James Newman and Embers and hope this won’t happen, but the last few years haven’t been too promising. If this does happens, bottoms up – we’ve earned it.
The Eurovision Song Contest airs at 8pm tonight on BBC One.
MORE : 12 of the biggest controversies in Eurovision Song Contest history
