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Zelda: Tears Of The Kingdom is a chore and has no respect for your time – Reader’s Feature-GameCentral-Entertainment – Metro
A long-time Zelda fan explains exactly why he doesn’t like Tears Of The Kingdom and why he considers it to be ‘infuriatingly dull.’
Zelda: Tears Of The Kingdom – a Link to a slog? (pic: Nintendo)
A long-time Zelda fan explains exactly why he doesn’t like Tears Of The Kingdom and why he considers it to be ‘infuriatingly dull.’
Is it okay now to say The Legend Of Zelda: Tears Of The Kingdom isn’t very good?
Almost a year has passed since the tiresome open world game was released to critical acclaim and that should be enough time to reconsider the gushing praise it received 12 months prior.
Before I talk about the game’s flaws, and there are many, I’ll start off by saying there are some genuinely amazing things on display in Tears Of The Kingdom. The much-vaunted Ultrahand has been well eulogised (I wasn’t fussed but you have to admire the technical brilliance behind it) and the Ascend ability is so good it’s the sort of thing you wish you had in every action adventure game.
Then there’s the moment where I wrongly believed the game would truly click into gear. When you ascend skywards towards the first temple, you’re so high up you could almost be in space. Even your companion Rito the bird hadn’t gone as far as that before. With thunderous clouds and ominous darkness, it’s masterfully atmospheric, and so cold that you can feel it emanate from your screen.
It was all downhill after that.
The trials and tribulations of modern, overblown open worlds took over. As polished and bug free as the game is, Tears Of The Kingdom is crippled by reprehensible grinding, horrendous pacing, tedious quests, a terrible opening with the insufferable Zelda, and useless companions – and that doesn’t even scratch the surface.
Underneath it, the Depths are so nauseating it’s like being in lockdown again, while the sky islands are a void of nothingness.
The fire temple, even though it’s short, is one of the worst dungeons in the history of the franchise. The one in the desert isn’t much better, and they help bring the game to a standstill. The game as a whole is an absolute chore to play, and you can spend countless hours going nowhere in frustration.
Zelda: Tears Of The Kingdom – not game of the year for everyone (Picture: Nintendo)
The worst thing about it is that a lot of people still think gaming simply involves sitting in lounge pants on a recliner all day, and Tears Of The Kingdom reinforces that view. It clearly has a real dislike for people with families, jobs, and other commitments.
It’s the champion of a doomed and unsustainable development philosophy, as we’ve seen from financially stricken studios who spend too much time and money on games that only need to be a fraction of the size.
Nintendo have unlimited resources, so can probably get away with it. But would their obviously very talented developers want to spend years making something as gruelling or something more fun, that can be finished in a sensible time?
The 10+ million sales that followed in the days after Tears Of The Kingdom’s release indicate they won’t have much of a choice.
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I’d imagine there will be a barrage of criticism about this article and that’s great, everyone is entitled to their view. But when Nintendo release the inevitable new and improved remastered version of Tears Of The Kingdom at some point in the next decade, I guarantee it’ll come with a raft of quality of life improvements to minimise the impact of the flaws I’ve just outlined.
Your comments will look a bit daft. But not as daft as burrowing your way through those ridiculously tedious networks of rock tunnels, thinking you’ve come to the end only to be met with another maze of bitesize rocks to break. And for what? Some pitiful reward that’s inferior to what you already have. This is not joyous discovery.
Oddly enough, I don’t remember Breath Of The Wild being as infuriatingly dull as its successor. But it started with a great opening and had a clearer focus, whereas Tears Of The Kingdom started out with the player being bored to death in a cave by Zelda and ended by going down an even deeper cave being shouted at. It was about as far removed from the series’ highs as you could get.
By reader David, a long time Zelda fan
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