My controversial cinema etiquette has people saying they’d risk jail-Sharan Dhaliwal-Entertainment – Metro

Unclench your jaws, relax those shoulders and stop being so boring, says Sharan (Picture: Giles Keyte/Universal Pictures via AP)

My mum and I followed an usher in the dark, as he carried foldable chairs and opened them against the back wall of the cinema.

I sat down, looking up to see fairy lights lining the screen, while a cup of chai was promptly placed in my hand. Then the film started and everyone began hooting and yelling in excitement. Many stood on their seats and danced in joy.

Throughout the film, people jeered, laughed, booed, and sang. There were even three power cuts, where people loudly complained and then cheered each time the power returned.

During the intermission, samosas were offered (I ate two) and there were constant chai refills.

This was in 1996 and I was 12 when I went to a screening of Bollywood classic Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge in Chandigarh, India. I’d been to watch Bollywood films before in the Cineworld in Feltham, London with my parents, but had never experienced anything like this before.

This is how I realised: This cinema in India is the way we’re supposed to be watching musical films. This simple fact became even more evident after November 22, when the release of Wicked led to public outcry over fans singing alongside their favourite songs during screenings.

Some people are against it, calling theatre goers ‘tone deaf’ and jokingly threatening to ‘spend life in prison’ by merely hearing a fan enjoy themselves. Others are awaiting a sing-a-long screening to be able to scream their favourite songs in joy without experiencing the side eyes and shushes of etiquette obsessed cinema goers.

The thing is, a lot of people have forgotten that they can just enjoy life. And, importantly, let others enjoy life too.

Unclench your jaws, relax those shoulders and stop being so boring. It feels like the whole of England is actually just one grumpy old man, stopping himself just enough from enjoying life. 

Perpetually, until the end of time.

You are going to watch Wicked, not Civil War. You’ll be okay.

If you don’t expect singing – in a film that’s all about singing – then it’s you. You’re the problem.

An innocent desire to sing a favourite song is being bulldozed by the boring, Sharan explains (Picture: Sharan Dhaliwal)

I understand if you’re watching a serious film, and you want to pay attention to important moments in the film. But a musical? It feels counter-productive to watch something enjoyable and not have any expression of enjoyment.

Also sure, maybe you don’t want to sing. But not letting others sing because you don’t want to? Sounds selfish to me.

It’s not just about musicals. I went to a screening of Nida Manzoor’s Polite Society at the BFI for their Art of Action Festival and it was such a gorgeous experience. People gasped, laughed loudly and even clapped, while cheering when the main character Ria Khan finally landed her flying kick.

I remember when Beyonce’s Renaissance aired in the US, people sang and danced along – a fan even reenacted the whole dance to Formation at a screening, with others voguing down the aisles of the cinema. Similarly, Black Panther was met with screams of joy, clapping and dancing in screens around the US.

I shared the moment cinema changed me with those I loved and did it with so much joy (Picture: Sharan Dhaliwal)

It doesn’t escape me that all these films encompass the culture of people of colour. 

And neither does it, that silencing enjoyment seems to be a form of misogyny and homophobia. Silencing the loud, brash and even those who dare to be themselves. 

Maybe it’s a white thing, a conservative thing, a British thing, a male thing – but either way, it’s become commonplace. Theatres are now asking people to stay silent during these showings, and many eager young people are feeling ostracised from something they love.

An innocent desire to sing a favourite song is being bulldozed by the boring.

Just this weekend, I held my own Bollywood night, for my (mostly) queer brown family, and we enjoyed an evening filled with talking, eating, laughing, an intermission quiz and singing. 

It was an expression of how the film made us feel – we questioned the patriarchy throughout (a drinking game included eating golgappe every time the main character was toxic), and commented non-stop on the actress Kajol’s beautiful face.

Fairy lights lined my floor, samosas and chai cups in everyone’s hands, as we screamed/sang all the songs. It came full circle. I shared the moment cinema changed me with those I loved and did it with so much joy.

Messages flooded my phone the next day, with my friends calling the evening: ‘very nourishing’ and ‘exactly the space I’ve been craving’.

Because going to the cinema and watching films – musical films especially – is supposed to be joyful. 

So, give the grump a rest, and let people have their joy. If you want to hit death-defying notes to Defying Gravity in the cinema, I say go for it.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing jess.austin@metro.co.uk. 

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