My wife piled on weight during her menopause and now she doesn’t want sex

DEAR DEIDRE: DURING her menopause, my wife piled on weight and now she doesn’t want sex any more.

Her extra pounds don’t bother me but they have made her self-conscious.

I don’t want to have an affair but I can’t go without sex much longer either

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I am 54, she’s 55 and we’ve been married for the past 20 years.

She says she feels ugly and won’t believe me when I tell her she’s gorgeous and I still fancy her.

I’ve tried everything – helping around the house, taking her out for date nights, talking to her about it – but nothing works.

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I am almost at the point of going to an escort to satisfy my need for sex.

I don’t want to have an affair but I can’t go without sex much longer either.

DEIDRE SAYS: It is common for women to put on weight and to lose interest in sex around menopause.

Suggest your wife sees her GP, as hormone replacement therapy could help her.

Be patient and don’t pressure her. Show her you love and want her.

Kisses and hugs also help create intimacy and might lead to more when she feels ready.

Please don’t have an affair – it could destroy your marriage and leave you feeling unfulfilled as well as guilty.

My support pack on menopause will explain more to you both.

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